I've been struggling a bit. I keep writing posts, and enjoy writing this blog, but I'm conflicted. I'm just starting to ask, 'What's it all for?"
Don't get me wrong, I don't have writer's block, I have hundreds of things to write about in this brain of mine...it just doesn't seem very important.
So, I'm starting to question why I do it and whether mine is just another blog in the wall....
Don't get me wrong, I don't have writer's block, I have hundreds of things to write about in this brain of mine...it just doesn't seem very important.
So, I'm starting to question why I do it and whether mine is just another blog in the wall....
The difficult part is that I have so much to say about really important things, but I know saying them will alienate some of my readers. I live and work in an ultra-conservative area and really don't feel like I can truly express what I feel.
For example, this week has two significant days...Columbus Day and National Coming Out Day. I'm not sure I can really say how I feel about these two days, although people who know me well already know .
So, I have these feelings inside and I can't really express them.
It's not like I'm being disingenuine or unauthentic. What you read is all me - it's just not all of me. Or, even half of me...
If I'm going to spend a few hours writing each week, I feel like it should make a difference in people's lives. I feel like I should do my part to encourage tolerance and acceptance and fight the opposite.
I know these blogs will serve as a history for Ella (I have them published in book form). But, I think I'd rather be a history maker than a preserver. I think that's why scrapbooking never really appealed to me. I'd rather live it than cut it out and put it in a book.
But yet, I'm not sure. It's fun to share my discoveries with you....all 60-350 people who read everyday. And, like any relationship, I didn't want to just spring it on you.
And, my beautiful daughter has asked me to keep writing it. I've been discussing it a lot with Greg and Ell overhears. If you saw the look on her face, you'd think I was about to run off and join the circus!
The nice thing is, I know this blog has inspired people....to write, to blog, to try new things like making cheese....and that's all good too.
So, no promises or announcements yet. Just thoughts running through my mind.
For example, this week has two significant days...Columbus Day and National Coming Out Day. I'm not sure I can really say how I feel about these two days, although people who know me well already know .
So, I have these feelings inside and I can't really express them.
It's not like I'm being disingenuine or unauthentic. What you read is all me - it's just not all of me. Or, even half of me...
If I'm going to spend a few hours writing each week, I feel like it should make a difference in people's lives. I feel like I should do my part to encourage tolerance and acceptance and fight the opposite.
I know these blogs will serve as a history for Ella (I have them published in book form). But, I think I'd rather be a history maker than a preserver. I think that's why scrapbooking never really appealed to me. I'd rather live it than cut it out and put it in a book.
But yet, I'm not sure. It's fun to share my discoveries with you....all 60-350 people who read everyday. And, like any relationship, I didn't want to just spring it on you.
And, my beautiful daughter has asked me to keep writing it. I've been discussing it a lot with Greg and Ell overhears. If you saw the look on her face, you'd think I was about to run off and join the circus!
The nice thing is, I know this blog has inspired people....to write, to blog, to try new things like making cheese....and that's all good too.
So, no promises or announcements yet. Just thoughts running through my mind.
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